Skip to main content

31 Days to a Fruitful Marriage Day Twenty Five: Discussing Your Problems and Discerning Feedback From Others

 
If there is one thing that can speed-up the end of a marriage, it's endless discussion of your problems with others and taking the wrong advice.
 
One thing you should never (and I am using the word "never") do is gripe about your spouse publically, berate them, make fun of them, be condescending about them, or belittle them on any public forum, including Facebook, church, or in social circles. You are supposed to be a team, not one against the other, and in this instance, do unto your spouse as you would have them do unto you. First of all, it makes other people really uncomfortable because they don't really know what to say. Secondly, there are few ways to come back from that in a marriage.
 
If you are frustrated in your marriage and don't really know what to do about it, there are many ways to get help. Have you talked about it with your spouse and vocalized your concerns in a non-confrontational way? If so, and you can't seem to solve the problem, a professional counselor or pastor could certainly help. If you are going to turn to friends for help, you must really keep in mind who you are asking advice from. Are these people from broken marriages, too? Are they giving you non-Biblical advice, such as acting in retaliation for wrongs or to commit infidelity? Are they telling you not to "back down?" Are they trying to convince you to treat your spouse in ways you wouldn't feel comfortable with your spouse treating you?
 
If so, you probably need to stop talking with them about your marriage. God can't work in an environment like that and you are not doing anything for yourself or your marriage except venting and focusing on the negative to other people. I really think before talking about problems in your marriage to friends or family, you have to remember that when this "problem" blows over, they will still remember what you've said. When you two are in a better place, it could make it really hard for your friends and family to continue to accept your spouse. Don't lie about your marriage and hide the truth, but discuss it with a trained person who can really help get you through the tough times and keep your problems confidential.
 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

What is Your Skin Care Regimen?

Since turning 34 this year, I've been really trying to make sure I am taking care of my skin. I have been using Cover Girl Liquid Powder for years, but it always seemed to break my neck out. And full disclosure, my face cleaning routine consisted of using Avery's baby wipes (which actually do remove eye makeup surprisingly well). So, needless to say, my skin didn't always look its best.   So, I received some gift cards for my birthday and I decided to go ahead and spring for some better products. First thing I did was get something designed to clean my face. I ordered the Olay ProX Microdermabrasion System.     This system came with the battery-operated scrubber with both a brush and foam pad, plus every day face wash and microdermabrasion wash to be used twice a week. I have really loved using this system. The beauty is that you can really use any face wash you'd like. I will probably buy a pore-reducing wash after the tube they sent me is empty. This syst...
1 comment
Read more

Why I am Pro Universal Healthcare and Changes to Our Healthcare System

Due to my recent proactivity with my credit and paying off debt, I decided to give the hospital a call where I was admitted about a month ago and ask about my bill. I wanted to make sure I didn't miss it in the mail and I wanted to get an idea of what I'd be paying for my stay. I get on the phone with the billing department and the woman is just as nice as can be, really. She was surprised I'd even called her, considering I didn't even have a bill yet. She told me she'd sent the bill over to my insurance to be approved and paid but they hadn't heard back yet. "Just out of curiosity," I asked, knowing I would be responsible for 20% of the final bill, "how much was it?" What I heard next shocked me.   "$61,000" she said.   I said, "$61,000? I was only in the hospital for a night and only on anti-biotics, you can't be serious! My daughter cost me less than a third of that to give birth to and I was in the hospital two nights!...
6 comments
Read more

Guess Who Has A New Potty???

This girl!! Jason and I took Avery to Target tonight to find a potty chair. We didn't know what kind to get. When we got there, she loved the Sesame Street one. It's the kind that sits on the toilet, not an actual chair. I've heard both reasonings on a chair and a pad for the real toilet. On one hand, the chairs are little and easier for them to sit on and they aren't scary to flush. On the other, the pad doesn't require you to have to clean out a chair and they teach kids to sit on the big potty from the get go. What it really came down to was that we just don't have a big bathroom at all, so keeping an actual chair in the bathroom would have been hard. So we got the pad. It has a little hook that you attach to the tank, so you can hang the pad on it. I love this!  I have no intention of actually potty training Avery full out, just yet. I don't think she is ready. But I have heard it's good to have one that they can practice sitting on and get u...
1 comment
Read more