So, I know I've posted many times about my issues with my weight. Well, this time I feel a renewed vigor to lose weight and keep it off. I don't know why I feel different this time, maybe I am just tired of looking at pictures and hating how I look, or avoiding taking pictures of me altogher. Maybe I am tired of feeling like a person that I am not on the inside. I don't know.
I've put off dieting and exercising for many reasons. I told myself I wanted to be prepared and have a plan, but in waiting for the right "plan" I've lost time I would have had to lose at least a few pounds. I think I am finding the "balance" in the weight loss this time around.
I told myself I wanted to do Atkins, but knowing me, I can't do it altogether, cold turkey. I just have too many bad habits when it comes to carbs and honestly, my pantry is not set up for Atkins. I am not going to go spend $200 to fill it up with carb-free foods, to just lose my focus for it and waste money. But I definitely can alter some habits little by little that are causing me to remain the weight I am now.
So, I've decided to start off slow. I've also decided, now that I am loosening our purse strings a little, that this is going to have been the only time in my life I've had this much weight to lose. If I am putting that much effort, I need some rewards to keep me motivated. When I weighed myself Monday, I was 184. I told myself when I get down to 170, I will get a tanning membership, which is something I've wanted back for about two years. At 160, it will be another reward. And 150, my goal weight, it will be a really great reward. I think rewards are what is keeping me going because I really, REALLY want sunless tanning back in my life again. I am blinding people!!!
I can tell you that these pictures had a lot to do with my decision to just start what I could about my diet and weight loss right now.
(Granted the first picture I was pregnant, but still...)
I am not going so far as to say I am ugly, because I am not. Keeping my self-confidence during these last 17 months has been one of the reasons I have stayed this weight for so long. I am not afraid to be in public, I don't think I am unattractive. My husband still thinks I am gorgeous. So looking at me in these shots doesn't make me cringe. It's just, the person I see in these pictures just isn't me. The person I still see, and want to be when I look in the mirror, is this person....
And this person...
And this person....
I loved that I could go shopping and find really cute things to wear that fit me and look good. I loved that I could wear a bathing suit and my legs were toned and my tummy wasn't running over. I loved that my face looked thin and I didn't have a double chin when I looked down. I loved that my "assets" were smaller and less cumbersome.
So, with that being said, I have a renewed vigor for getting this done this time. There just aren't any more excuses for not. I feel as though my adjusting some things in my daily habits, the first 15 pounds will be easier to lose than the last 20, but we can cross that bridge when we get to it. I think that will take a more strict exercise regiman and diet, but like I said, one thing at a time.
1. I have removed ALL sodas, including diet ones, from my diet. I have begun drinking very large amounts of water daily and have also begun drinking hot tea (green, black, whichever is available). Just from this change, in the last three days, I've noticed my tummy has gone down considerably.
2. I have begun counting calories on MyFitnessPal.com and am limiting the number of carbs I eat daily. This one is hard because I am finding that the things I didn't think were really high in carbs are in fact, the highest. Milk, for example. I know that milk has it's own health benefits, but just eating peanut butter whole wheat toast and milk for breakfast destroys my calorie and sugar count for the day. So, I am having to find new things I can eat in place of the old.
3. I have also limited my sugar intake. I am not so concerned if my sugar comes from nutritionally healthy foods at this point, but I can't let it come from candy and treats. We currently have 4 gallons of Blue Bell Ice Cream that my in-laws so wonderfully got for us over the weekend. Honestly, I am not even tempted to have it but in the past, I would have thought, "I can't let this go to waste!"
4. I am trying to incorporate exercises, even if they are only 10 minutes long, into my week as often as I can. This one is proving to be the hardest, ONLY because of my schedule. But I've been good at doing it in the mornings.
I weighed myself this morning and I weighed 180, which means that in the last 3 days I've lost 4 pounds. I have a feeling every bit of that is water weight and I have a feeling that I was dehydrated, so this weight loss might be misleading. But it's given me a jolt to know that the things I am doing are working.
Think about me as you go through your day, would you? I need some support because this isn't going to always be this easy, especially when I have to get creative on foods I can eat! I will let everyone know progress as it comes!