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Avery's New Stepmom

So, there's a pretty large piece of the puzzle I've kept to myself about this entire situation.

My ex-husband is now married. Again. 

I was really not going to write about this on my blog, but Avery has been told by her dad and is talking about it with anyone who will listen, so there really isn't a point keeping it a secret anymore. 

I'm not sure I can accurately put into words how it feels to be betrayed in the way I've been betrayed. Not just by a man, but by several people. A few weeks ago - remember my grief? - I found this out and had a very difficult time dealing with it. I found out about them getting married. Not finding out that there would be another woman in the picture. That I've known for some time.

I was humiliated at first. How could I not be. But It's become pretty evident that this isn't my humiliation to bare. Yes, it happened to me, but it's not my fault, nor is it my burden to carry.

What this does mean is that on weekends when Avery is with her dad, she is also with her new stepmom. I had no idea I would have to adjust to this so quickly, nor was I expecting Avery to have to adjust to this so quickly. But - it's the reality of the situation and there's not a darn thing either of us can do about it except adjust, deal and move on. 

Avery is actually handling all of this as well as can be expected. Do I wish there wasn't so much selfishness and lack of awareness that this marriage could have waited, for the sake of everyone involved? Yes. I do. But, that's not my choice. So, what can you do. 

I realize that me making this public on my page is going to be surprising to some people. It might make some people upset. There are going to be some who will be very embarrassed about it. But when you involve a kid who is 7 and is the most talkative and honest kid on the planet in your situation, the jig is up, there's not much I can do to hide it anymore. 

I'm really OK with it. Guys - I am much, much better off. I'm glad this happened now, when I am still young and amazing, and it's only been 9 years as opposed to 29 years and a lifetime of lies. I'm also a little glad it moved this quickly - just kind of ripped off the band-aid in one big swoop. 

What I do know is that you never know what can happen from one year to the next. Who knows where we will be next year at the same time. In a better place, I hope. I know Avery and I will be just fine. We really will be. We are looking forward to starting fresh, the two of us, with our new little family in a new house. Be sad but don't feel sorry. I don't feel sorry. I feel blessed God pulled me out when he did. 

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